


White Sheets, Black Hair

by KatyaMorrigan



Category: Six of Crows Series - Leigh Bardugo
Genre: Coping, F/M, Finding ways to be intimate without touching, Inej laughing, Kaz being smooth, Kaz is secretly hella anxious, Non-Sexual Intimacy, Sharing a Bed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-25
Updated: 2020-11-25
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:35:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,480
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27710794
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KatyaMorrigan/pseuds/KatyaMorrigan
Summary: Kaz is terrified to share a bed with Inej. It was his idea, so why is he so freaked out by it? But when you're with someone who can relate to your struggles, it's easier than anything else to work out the boundaries and still sleep well.Super short.
Relationships: Kaz Brekker/Inej Ghafa
Comments: 2
Kudos: 82





	White Sheets, Black Hair

**Author's Note:**

> Day 24 of my NaNoWriMo writing challenge this year - one oneshot a day, every day for the whole of November. I'm following the SOFTober 2020 prompts by @wafflesandkruge on Instagram to give me some fluffy starting points for the coming month of fics.  
> The prompt for today was "bed".  
> I hope you enjoy!

“We can do this,” Kaz said, trying to assure himself far more than Inej. “This isn’t a problem.”

“Agreed.”

“It’s not difficult. We’re adults.”

“Well, teenagers, but yes.”

“We know how to do things, is what I mean. We’re experienced. We’ve both killed people before.”

Inej sighed. “Yes, we have.”

“This isn’t a big deal.”

“You are making it one, somewhat.”

Kaz looked at her. She was smiling at him, but with an amused curl to her lip that made him sigh.

“Sharing a bed _is_ a big deal for us,” he said.

“In that it is an exciting position to be in, yes. But not that you need to be stressing this much over.”

“I’m not stressed.”

Inej tilted her head towards him. “My stress is valid.”

“Of course love,” she replied, “but I do feel like this experience isn’t going to be as enjoyable as it could be if you treat this like a military operation.”

Kaz looked around the room. The sun had set a few hours ago, and he and Inej had finished up their meal with their friends at the Crow Club not long before. Returning to the Slat, Kaz had suggested that Inej spend the night in his bed. With him. Sleeping beside him. It had been a snap decision, one that he was immediately regretting as thoughts of everything that could go wrong started to pile in his head. Yes, it was a wonderful thing that he had dreamed about, but now the prominent feeling he had was fear. _What if it all went wrong?_

His bed was a simple double mattress on the floor, with two thin pillows and a large white duvet. He did everything with little grace, and his sleeping arrangement was much the same. All the beds in the Slat were like this, but somehow his was even more Kaz-like than that. Inej normally slept three floors below him, but she had always liked his office bedroom, with the tallest windows in the building that allowed her to look out to the sky and sometimes the sea when the fog rose. It was only natural after being together for so long that they start trying to cohabit more intimately. But that was exactly the thing that scared them both, albeit Kaz more than Inej: intimacy. He was terrified of lying beside her in the night, terrified of what might happen if their skin brushed, terrified of making her feel trapped or unsafe or in any way there beyond her will. Kaz Brekker wasn’t meant to be scared of anything, least of all sleeping with a woman, and yet here he was, wrangling with his breathing while Inej gave him sympathetic but amused looks.

“Treating things like military operations makes them within my control,” he said. “I can make a plan to break into the Ice Court. This is nothing compared to that.”

“Of course,” Inej smiled. “But I might find it easier to sleep without a regimented list of objectives in mind.”

She raised her eyebrows at him, and Kaz gave a small smile. He walked over to her and took her hand in his gloved one.

“I’m sorry for making this harder.”

“It was never going to be easy for us,” Inej said, running her thumb over the back of his hand. He could feel the light pressure even through the leather. “But let’s just trust each other and the moment. Precautions put us in a fearful mindset. We need a mindset of compassion here.”

Kaz grimaced. Compassion wasn’t exactly a noun that went easily with his name.

“Okay,” Inej grinned, “if that’s too hard, how about we just set some easy ground rules?” He nodded.

“We wear long nightclothes, and I will wear my gloves as well.”

“Are you sure you can sleep like that?”

“I have done before.”

“It doesn’t sound comfortable.”

“It’s more comfortable than flashbacks in my sleep.”

“Fair point.” Inej raised her eyebrows and exhaled slowly. “No crowding me. If I’m on my side, please don’t curl around me. I would prefer space around me at all times, or to be the one initiating any touch.”

“That’s no problem, love.”

“No spooning, really. Unless you want to be little spoon.” She gave him a wicked grin, and laughed as he frowned. “Not tempted?”

“I’ll let you put “Kaz Brekker” and “little spoon” in a sentence yourself, and you can judge whether than seems likely.”

Inej laughed again, and Kaz’s mood brightened. She was so lovely in the yellowy darkness, her face glowing in the faint lamplight that cast shadows around the room. Kaz knew he always picked out her face in any crowd, but when she attracted gold like this, it was hardly any wonder.

“Anything else we need to add?” she asked.

“I think that works for now,” Kaz said. “I shall get changed.”

He went to leave the room, but Inej made a curious noise.

“You don’t have to leave, you know. We can just… turn around.”

“Alright then.”

Kaz swallowed and walked over to his dresser. He pulled out a long-sleeved nightshirt and pair of drawers that reached just above his ankles, and slowly began to undress. Although he absolutely trusted Inej, there was still a feeling in his mind that she might watch him. Did he mind? No. He was unconcerned by Inej’s view of his appearance from the neck down. But it was the lack of seeing, the inability to know if she was going against her own words. That was what made him nervous.

He turned around after putting away his dress shirt and waistcoat to see Inej in her underclothes: a tight sleeveless top and pair of drawers, both black. Her hair was no longer in a thick bun at the nape of her neck, instead hanging as a long braided rope down her back. It swung as she moved to collect up her clothes, neatly folding them and joining Kaz at the dresser to leave them in a careful pile on top.

“Covered enough?” she asked, spreading her arms. Kaz looked across her toned arms and slim waist, seeing how much bare skin there was.

“I think you’ll want more,” he said, reaching into another drawer. “Borrow one of these.”

He handed her a white nightshirt identical to his, and saw her face brighten with a smile. She pulled it on over her undershirt and shook out the sleeves. They covered her small hands.

“Much better,” Inej grinned. “Shall we?”

She offered a sleeved hand to Kaz, who smiled in return and took it in his gloved hand. They walked over to the bed together, separating to take their side and lift up the covers. Kaz leaned over to blow out the oil lamp, and climbed in beside Inej. She was still visible in the half-darkness, her golden form such a clear contrast against the white sheets and pillows.

“This is possible,” she murmured to him, her white teeth shining. “Look at us. Lying in bed together.”

He gave a comfortable chuckle, shifting his weight off of his bad leg so that he could look at Inej. As his eyes created fuzz in the dim light, her features swam in and out of focus. She was like a dream, some perfect impression of herself. How lucky he was.

“Do you ever think how impossible it was that we met?” Inej whispered.

“No.”

“I was born in Ravka, lived there so much of my life, then was stolen away to Ketterdam, where you didn’t live until you were a teenager yourself. What were the odds that you would visit the Menagerie and see me that day?”

“I think the odds were likely.”

“Why’s that? It’s all a collection of beautiful luck.”

“Don’t your Saints believe in divine intervention?”

Kaz had to admit that that was a line even Nina would have been proud of him for. He felt Inej wriggle delightedly, and saw her cover her face for a moment.

“That’s a memory I’m keeping safe,” she said.

It was impossible not to smile then. They both chuckled happily together, and Kaz reached out to cup her face gently. For the first time he wondered what it could be like to feel the warmth of her skin without the extra layer between them.

They lay like that for a while, and Kaz heard Inej’s breathing slow and deepen. She was falling asleep, her face in his hands. He didn’t move, just watched her face swim before him, feeling his own eyelids becoming heavy. Kaz didn’t want to fall asleep. He wanted to stay here, watching her all night.

But the bed was warm and heavy with the extra person inside it, and Kaz drifted off far more easily than he would have liked, his dreams full of her face and her smile and that perfect laugh.

**Author's Note:**

> Well, I wasn't feeling that one, if I'm honest. Definitely want to revisit this at a later date and nail those characters because I feel like I strayed too far from their usual characterisation. Welp, it's writing, and I've done it. Hope someone can still enjoy it before I spruce it up a little. 
> 
> The next prompt is "care", and it will be another Kaz/Inej fic.


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